| Long Distance Relationships | |
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(Jedi)Obi-JK - Student  |
Howdy all, So I met this awesome girl (if you read my 40 days and 40 nights post, its the same one) Our whole getting to know each other so well thing started based on this bet, and it is probably the single best thing that has ever happened to me. Soon after we started dating "exclusively" she tells me she got a job at a company she has always wanted to work for in California, "BUT" if I was willing to take a relationship to the next level and asked her to stay she would. As much as I wanted to ask her to stay I couldn't, IMHO that just isn't fair to her, and she would most likely end up resenting me on some level for it, in the future. So we have agreed to try the long distance relationship route. We both know this is gonna suck sometimes, and be insanely hard, but we just weren't willing to give "us" up. So I was just wondering if anyone here is in or has been in a long distance relationship, and if there is any advice you can provide as to things that work well, and things to avoid. This is the plans we have so far, for reserving time to see each other. 1.) In less than a month I will be on spring break, and take a weeks vacation from work, and come visit her. 2.) After that we plan to fly to see each other once a month (I will go there every other month she will come here every other month) 3.) The company I work for has an office two blocks from the company she is going to work for, and my boss said there is a good chance I can work out of that office for the summer. ANY advice anyone can give will be appreciated. _______________ Silent Bob (Kevin Smith): You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you. -Steve (Obi) |
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Dicemaster - Student 
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well, i have not had one yet, but as i'm a senior in high school, dating a junior, i'm guessing i will have one next year when i go off to college, although it will be more like a 2 hour car drive, not a 3 day car drive or 8 hour expensive flight. I agree with the other guys, trust is critical. Also, if things continue to get serious, why don't you talk to your boss about a complete transfer to the location in CA....just move out there, it will show her how commited you are to her, and will show her how much she means to you. -Dice _______________ Dicemaster |
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_Muro_ - Student 
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Well I wasn't ever in a situation like that but I would agree with Bail. Trust is the most important thing in relationships, if u really love and trust her you won't betray her with other girl, and the same goes for her. I don't know what kind of person you are nor she is, but you have to trust and love each other really, really much. If you'll be even a little jelaous about her, it'll show that you don't trust her, she will be mad at you and your relationship will crush... I have a friend that is fu**ing much jealous about his girlfriend, they love each other much, but when they started to be jelaous about themselves they started to quarrel almost everyday... P.S. Sorry if u couldn't understand me :/ _______________ *Proud comment owner of: Dash Starlight's - 700th, Buster Senatu's - 100th, Yuken Zalak's - 250th, Laziana's - 100th, Para's - 75th, Zeke Asakura's - 800th! 
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student 
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Okay, long distance relationships I used to have one of them 1.5 hour drive away from each other. First point is trust Believe me, everything will revolve around you trusting her, and she trusting you. It'll be hard, if you hear she's off at a party. "Will she meet someone, will she sleep with that person," etc etc. I've been there before, I know how it feels. Don't tell her that you've been thinking this. She'll think you don't trust her, and if you don't solve it soon, you'll lose her. Don't make the same mistake as I did ... Of course always show interest to what he has to say, but you know that, I'm sure, so no problem there. Distrust will probably be your biggest enemy. if this doesn't tear you apart, then I take it you're OK. However, I noticed that everyone responds to these kind of situations in a different way. Some respond by distrust, others by missing her awfully, and I don't doubt there are a gazillion cases here. Don't be afraid to talk it up with a friend if you need help. Ever need to talk or something, you're free to add me to MSN _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. |
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Devlin - Student 
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Be sure to listen, but also be sure that she's listening to you too  _______________ Be at peace, and you will discover things you never dreamed possible. |
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Hardwired - Retired 
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Ok...OUCH... Me and my girl lived about a 2 hour drive appart. So you are worse off there. But the basics are the same. Keeping a goot phone connection is vital. And when you spend time together you shouldn't waste time. I mean...a quarrel isn't something you want.. Basicly you just have to be strong..and cherrish the time you do spent together. - HW _______________ ::Nothing wrong with a little shooting.....as long as the right people get shot:: |
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(Jedi)Obi-JK - Student 
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Michigan to California I think around 2,000 miles? Its an 8 flight with 1 stop (90% of the flights are like this) or for like and extra $100 you can get a 5 hour flight with no stops. _______________ Silent Bob (Kevin Smith): You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you. -Steve (Obi) |
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Hardwired - Retired
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It would be intersting how long this particular distance is. But either way. Me an my girl had a distance relationship going for quite a long while. We saw each other every third or fourth weekend. Virtually once a month. It was hard..very hard at times. Cause missing her could tear me apart inside. But we managed. If the feelings are strong and the mind is willing..Then it can be done. One thing we did was talk a minimum of once per day, but very often twice. - HW _______________ ::Nothing wrong with a little shooting.....as long as the right people get shot:: |
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