| Joke of the Every Couple of Days!!! | |
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Battlin' Billy - Student  |
Permanent
I'll try to post one joke a day on here. Feel free to add a joke or 2 yourself._______________ Midbie Council Member #2 - Profile ID 2073 | Member of B@rtM@ulS@ar | Owner of Monty's 2000th comment & D@RtHM@UL's 8100th comment | Former Padawan of SilkMonkey & Arcuss JA Goaltender & NHL Fan | Fellow Rush fan to Axion|Plo Koon is my oldest JA friend Post your RL pics HERE! | Post you JK2/JK3 screenies HERE! This post was edited by doobie on Mar 02 2004 04:52pm. |
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tarpman - The Tarped Avenger 
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-_-' _______________ Saving the world, one kilobyte at a time. |
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Shang Chi - Student 
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Two cannibals were dining on a clown. One cannibal turned to the other and asked, "Does this taste funny to you?" _______________ Thirty spokes converge on a single hub, but it is in the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the cart lies. Clay is molded to make a pot, but it is the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the clay pot lies. Cut out doors and windows to make a room, but it is in the spaces where there is nothing that the usefulness of the room lies. Therefore, Benefit may be derived from something, but it is in nothing that we find usefulness. |
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xAnAtOs - Student |
Hahah nice  _______________ Brother to Luke Skywalker and (SKX) Dark Blade 
Lag Brother to Acey Spadey 
Jools is my best friend.
<Henkes> nebody feeling like abusing me with a lightsaber?|+Smilykrazy grabs Gradius, beats the living CRAP out of him, then throws him into a huge vat of ACID |
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Scythus Aratan - Student 
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HAHAHAHAHAHA! That was awesome  . _______________ Padawan to the great Jacen Aratan! <Setementor> Scythus is a genius! Claimer of the 5000th post in the Count thread [Solitude] scy rocks [Casual] good point scythus, you're really smart |
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Phantom - Student 
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THE YEAR'S BEST [ACTUAL] HEADLINES OF 2004: Crack Found on Governor's Daughter [imagine that!] Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says [no, really?] Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers [now that's taking things a bit far!] Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? [not if I wipe thoroughly!] Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [what a guy!] Miners Refuse to Work after Death [no-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!] Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant [see if that works any better than a fair trial!] War Dims Hope for Peace [I can see where it might have that effect!] If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile [you think?!] Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures [who would have thought!] Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide [they may be on to something!] Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges [you mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!] Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge [he probably IS the battery charge!] New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group [weren't they fat enough?!] Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft [That what he gets for eating those beans!] Kids Make Nutritious Snacks [Taste like chicken!] Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy [That was really giving of himself!] Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!] Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors [Boy, are they tall!] And the winner is.... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead [nuff said!]. _______________ -Phantom Ex-Master to Threat. Proud owner of Sazabi's 1500th comment! And Threats 50th comment "Insanity: a perfect rational adjustment to an insane world" |
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Italian Ice - Student 
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A friend asked me the other day why I never got married. I replied "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman... I guess I've been looking for the perfect girl." "Oh, come on now," said my friend. "Surely you have met at least one girl that you wanted to marry." "Yes, there was one girl... once. I guess she was the one perfect girl -- the only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything... I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me." "Well, why didn't you marry her?" asked my friend. I shrugged my shoulders and replied, "She was looking for the perfect man. _______________ It's funny how many people know they have the right to remain silent, yet never do. |
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solitude - Jedi Council 
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there were no wrong choices. hitler did bad things, but is a very charismatic leader who did what he thought was best for his country. he wasnt corrupt and had principles putting him ahead of modren politicians. sure he was insane and screwed it all up and made lots of bad things happen, but in theory he was a good politcian. (do not flame me for this  ) _______________ Joined 16 October 2004 | Retired 10 April 2005 | Returned 05 June 2008 | Made Staff 27 June 2008 | Made Council 18 January 2009 Padawan To Odan-Wei Belouve | Adopted into the Belouve family | Twin to xAnAtOs | Owner of the 4th Quesi sexy badge Brother To Roan Belouve, Nomad, Majno, Silkmonkey, Kensei and Jarhok Belouve
Owner Of Virtue's 1000th profile comment, Mr. Doobie's 1000th profile comment, Gradius' 2500th comment, xAnAtOs' 2500th comment, Rosered's 1500th comment, Laziana's 900th comment, Scythus' 500th comment and Echuu's 100th comment |
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Cheta T. Must - Student 
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okay for the canidate thing NOT CHEATING i chose A cause no prez is that upright for abortion i did'nt say yes or no then i saw bottom |
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Phantom - Student
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Omg I made all the wrong choses! LAMO! _______________ -Phantom Ex-Master to Threat. Proud owner of Sazabi's 1500th comment! And Threats 50th comment "Insanity: a perfect rational adjustment to an insane world" |
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thewind - Student |
Two Tough Questions Question 1: If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion? Read the next question before looking at the response for this one. Question 2: It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three candidates. Candidate A. Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with an astrologist. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day. Candidate B. He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening. Candidate C. He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, only drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife. Which of these candidates would be your choice? Decide first ... no peeking, then scroll down for the response. ------------------------------------------------------- Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt. Candidate B is Winston Churchill. Candidate C is Adolph Hitler. And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question: If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven. |
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Matej - Student |
Quote: Man: Oh sh*t! ROFL FLASH!!! |
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Nemesis Nova - Student 
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Phantom, stick your finger up your nose, maybe you'll understand _______________ Stop with the stupid sigs would you? Yea sure, why not, i'll stop asking myself things too... |
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Phantom - Student
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I dont get it is he Michael Jackson or something  _______________ -Phantom Ex-Master to Threat. Proud owner of Sazabi's 1500th comment! And Threats 50th comment "Insanity: a perfect rational adjustment to an insane world" |
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Morgan_Tao - Student 
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Little Johnny's teacher found Little Johnny in the playground studying something in his hand. He leaned closer while Little Johnny held the tiny object up to the light, saying, "Well, it looks plastic." Then he rolled it between his fingers, adding, "But it feels like rubber." Curious, the teacher asked, "What do you have there?" Little Johnny replied, "I don't know, but it looks like plastic and feels like rubber." The teacher responded, "Let me take a look." So Little Johnny handed it over and the teacher rolled it between his thumb and fingers, then examined it closely by sniffing and licking it. "Yeah, it does look like plastic and feel like rubber, has no significant smell or taste, I sure don't know what it is. Where did you get it?" Little Johnny replied, "Out of my nose." |
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Vasper Ba'xian - Student 
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HAHA! _______________ Brother to: Tamal, Kavar, J.D.,Jermia, Devlin, Ulic, Xiabara, Seij,Tarron Mib,>>>ROCK ON  .My Spacescapes art page.My Everything Else art page. MY FAV. Jedi Are: Qui-Gon Jinn, Corran Horn, and Anakin Solo. Unofficial Master to Tamal. and Kavar. Founder of the Wuji Hundun Jian saber style. Proud owner of Tamal's 200th comment!//Proud owner of Refl3x's 300th comment!>>>Proud owner of Tyrant's 800th comment>>>Proud owner of Lucky's 170th comment>>>Proud owner of BDKawika's 444th comment>>>To except Existance is to except Reality.
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Iceman - away- - Student |
Oh. European... |
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Raziel Anjelis - Student 
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tonto = native american. Goldstein = Jewish. Bubba = Redneck. _______________ Proud owner of El Vee For's 200th Comment, and Wicek's 2600th comment DaMi3N's 400th, Trad Redav's 666th.
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Iceman - away- - Student |
I don't get it. |
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solitude - Jedi Council 
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rofl _______________ Joined 16 October 2004 | Retired 10 April 2005 | Returned 05 June 2008 | Made Staff 27 June 2008 | Made Council 18 January 2009 Padawan To Odan-Wei Belouve | Adopted into the Belouve family | Twin to xAnAtOs | Owner of the 4th Quesi sexy badge Brother To Roan Belouve, Nomad, Majno, Silkmonkey, Kensei and Jarhok Belouve
Owner Of Virtue's 1000th profile comment, Mr. Doobie's 1000th profile comment, Gradius' 2500th comment, xAnAtOs' 2500th comment, Rosered's 1500th comment, Laziana's 900th comment, Scythus' 500th comment and Echuu's 100th comment |
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Shang Chi - Student 
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A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, "Business trip or vacation?" She turned, smiled and said, "Business, the Annual Sexual Education Convention in Chicago." He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen, sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for sex education! Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?" "Lecturer," she responded. "I use my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality." "Really," he said. "What myths are those?" "Well," she explained, "one popular myth is that African American men are the best endowed, when in fact it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. "Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Jewish descent. "We have, however, found that the best potential lover in all categories is the Southern Redneck." Suddenly, the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry," she said. "I shouldn't really be discussing this with you. I don't even know your name." "Tonto," the man said. "Tonto Goldstein. But my friends call me Bubba." _______________ Thirty spokes converge on a single hub, but it is in the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the cart lies. Clay is molded to make a pot, but it is the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the clay pot lies. Cut out doors and windows to make a room, but it is in the spaces where there is nothing that the usefulness of the room lies. Therefore, Benefit may be derived from something, but it is in nothing that we find usefulness. |
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DJK - Student 
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Rofl |
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Phantom - Student
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Two married buddies are out drinking one night, when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. Take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, get undressed in the bathroom, stick my foot in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing sounds. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up, and yells at me for staying out so late! "His buddy looks at him and says "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, pee hard into the toilet water, then use the full flush, throw my shoes in the closet, undress in the bedroom, then jump into bed, slap her on the arse and say!, WHO'S HORNY?!!!" and she acts like she's sound asleep. _______________ -Phantom Ex-Master to Threat. Proud owner of Sazabi's 1500th comment! And Threats 50th comment "Insanity: a perfect rational adjustment to an insane world" |
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Phantom - Student 
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lol _______________ -Phantom Ex-Master to Threat. Proud owner of Sazabi's 1500th comment! And Threats 50th comment "Insanity: a perfect rational adjustment to an insane world" |
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Raziel Anjelis - Student 
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oooooh harsh! lol Has anyone noticed that Billeeeeeeee hasnt posted many? _______________ Proud owner of El Vee For's 200th Comment, and Wicek's 2600th comment DaMi3N's 400th, Trad Redav's 666th.
This comment was edited by Raziel Anjelis on Mar 03 2005 10:31pm. |
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