| Things i learned from watching the movie COMMANDO... [edited title for buzz's pleasure] | |
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Monteeeeeee - Nugget  |
Absolutly Hillarious if u have seen it like 100 times like most people have by now.
note all material is from a different website and not written by me. 1) Porsches can "heal" themselves after repeatedly crashing into a Fiat and rolling onto their sides. 2) Two people can crash into a pole at 50 mph, wearing no seatbelts, and walk away. 3) Uzi's do not run out of ammunition until everyone is dead. 4) Being electrocuted will give you superhuman strength. 5) The best place to lock up a hostage is in a large roomwith balsa wood covering the window openings, with no guards outside the window. 6) The only way to break through balsa wood is with a disassembled doorknob. 7) Cheap airplanes are started by punching the control panel and saying "Fly or DIE!" 8) The best way to discreetly tell someone that people may be out to get him is by flying a military helicopter through the rolling mountains of Southern California to meet him. 9) Three men in a van can easily survive an explosion caused by a rocket being shot into the van's gas tank. 10) You can't just unbutton someone's shirt. You have to rip it open, and hold it open while talking to them. 11) A man's center of gravity does not change when picking up another man and holding him at arm's length. 12) Surplus stores have enough equipment to blow up an entire compound. 13) The only way to break into a surplus store is by driving your handy bulldozer through the front of it, for everyone to see. 14) However, no one will see what happened in (13). 15) A Ford Bronco with no brakes can still brake. 16) A Ford Bronco will explode three times upon rollover. 17) Tranquilizer darts are instantaneously effective. 18) One can walk about an airplane during takeoff if he claims that he is airsick. 19) Old Fiats are as fast as new Porsches. 20) Explosives set on the outside of a building will cause the building to explode from the inside. 21) Upon being scalped by circular saw blade, one becomes instantly pale. 22) Really good hair gel will not wash out, period. 23) Shopping malls have about 100 inept security guards apiece. 24) The best place to secretly exchange false documents for a briefcase-full of money is in a very public bar in a very public shopping mall. 25) Upon being blown up by a hand grenade, one does an acrobatic somersault. 26) Upon being shot, one acts like a cartoon character tripping backwards over a step. 27) Hedge deflects bullets. 28) If your daughter is being held hostage on an island, you should blow up every building on that island except one, because chances are she'll be in that one. 29) People commonly use stairs to get onto large commercial jetliners at Los Angeles International Airport, not jetways. 30) If a large truck comes barreling down a mountain toward you while you are driving, you should not brake. Instead, you should just say, "he's gonna hit us!" and keep driving at the same speed. 31) When the "good guy" is firing his weapon his accuracy increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. Made me giggle alot while reading it  _______________ If you add me to MSN, tell me who you are 
Best Movie Character EVER!! This post was edited by Hardwired on May 10 2007 02:36am. |
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Rogue - Student 
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love to bump old threads, watched this the other day i felt compelled to come and bump this
Please fight that urge in the future. Please. - HW I'm sure there is no problem with bumping an old post if you believe people will enjoy and/or benefit from it.... _______________ I was a child when I joined the JA...scary. |
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NotSoLittleCaesar - Student 
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love to bump old threads, watched this the other day i felt compelled to come and bump this
Please fight that urge in the future. Please. - HW killjoy  _______________ Quote: I mostly agree oh Lord of the squeezy mop
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Monteeeeeee - Nugget 
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love to bump old threads, watched this the other day i felt compelled to come and bump this
Please fight that urge in the future. Please. - HW pfft with all the serious posts nowdays i figure a bit of laughter would be ok. I guess not _______________ If you add me to MSN, tell me who you are
Best Movie Character EVER!! |
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planK - Jedi Council 
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love to bump old threads, watched this the other day i felt compelled to come and bump this
Please fight that urge in the future. Please. - HW But it's a funny post! Although, it's in the wrong section. But still, I LOL'D!!1 |
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Hardwired - Retired 
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Quote: love to bump old threads, watched this the other day i felt compelled to come and bump this
Please fight that urge in the future. Please. - HW _______________ ::Nothing wrong with a little shooting.....as long as the right people get shot:: |
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planK - Jedi Council
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OMG CHUCK NORRIS SHOULDA BEEN COMMANDO |
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NotSoLittleCaesar - Student 
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lol _______________ Quote: I mostly agree oh Lord of the squeezy mop
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Monteeeeeee - Nugget 
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love to bump old threads, watched this the other day i felt compelled to come and bump this _______________ If you add me to MSN, tell me who you are
Best Movie Character EVER!! |
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JavaGuy - Student 
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Quote: I learnt that Green Beret's are not just for breakfast you can eat them any time of day. Did you watch the porno version? We're talking about the Arnie version. _______________ My signature is only one line. You're welcome. |
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Kenwan Obiobi - Student |
Oh dear. |
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Menaxia - Student 
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Quote: Hehe, chill out dude. I'm just correcting ya. No offence intended.  I know -.- and im even bothered. u r or you wouldn't say that!!! _______________ This is not the place to look for me |
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Jade Jedi - Retired 
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I learnt that Green Beret's are not just for breakfast you can eat them any time of day. _______________ *CLICKEH->Never risk the Fett Man|*Download my Saber here. Made by master craftsman Pink Floyd_Mintaka + his 2002 & 4000 comment's [Laz's 700th comment][BDKawika's 600th comment] & Owner of a TOWEL award!!|Master: Sared Padawans: Rage-Ball and Dante Eagle.|*Jade Jedi at The Jedi Academy Archives "There's only one Return and it's not of the King it's of the Jedi" Randal Clerks 2 The top 10 reasons why I procrastinate: 1. This comment was edited by Jade Jedi on Jan 27 2006 01:55pm. |
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Kenwan Obiobi - Student |
Quote: Hehe, chill out dude. I'm just correcting ya. No offence intended. I know -.- and im even bothered. |
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Mic Den Octela - Student 
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Hehe, chill out dude. I'm just correcting ya. No offence intended. _______________ -Padawan of Virtue -Brother of Menaxia, *|irael, Krynn Adept, Majno, Ris Win Juljul, DaMi3N, Beowulf, Dash Starlight, Carrock and Yuken Zalak Bartender at Munes bar. Sir Mic of Nippledom! Proudly beating Wang, since '07. (Crackdown) This comment was edited by Mic Den Octela on Jan 25 2006 11:42pm. |
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Kenwan Obiobi - Student |
Quote: KW, those points weren't Monteeeeeee's, he found them somewhere and he agreed with the humouur. then kindly posted them here for us all to join in with the merry laughter. And?  Im just putting my point down anyway...Great post Monteeeeeeeeeeee. |
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Aiddat - Student 
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Bwahahaha. _______________ -Aiddat, the Gran with the green blades. "You have a right to be angry, but believe me when I say you don't want to feed that emotion." - Kyle Katarn {Owner of Liso Jowol's 550th comment, Conchris Chaotic's 80th, 150th and 350th comments, Pink Floyd's 200th comment Tyrant's 695th comment, D@RTHM@UL's 10600th comment}, accidentally tricked Pink Floyd into giving me his 1700th comment, I also have Alexander D'Kana's 1950th comment, Mindrith Pride's 1850th comment and I used the same accidental trick on Lewis's 100th comment, and I have Aiddat's 1992nd comment (birthyear), and #Elmo's 450th comment. Unsuccessfully tried to prove Senor Hat's theory wrong. Click for screenshots. Padawan of R2-D2. |
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D@RtHM@UL - Student 
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Haha, good stuff, so true too |
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JavaGuy - Student 
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I'd add: If you don't know how to use a rocket launcher, read the instructions. _______________ My signature is only one line. You're welcome. |
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Mic Den Octela - Student 
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KW, those points weren't Monteeeeeee's, he found them somewhere and he agreed with the humouur. then kindly posted them here for us all to join in with the merry laughter. _______________ -Padawan of Virtue -Brother of Menaxia, *|irael, Krynn Adept, Majno, Ris Win Juljul, DaMi3N, Beowulf, Dash Starlight, Carrock and Yuken Zalak Bartender at Munes bar. Sir Mic of Nippledom! Proudly beating Wang, since '07. (Crackdown) |
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Kenwan Obiobi - Student |
AWESOME FILM.... Two points you missed out which also seemed pretty unrealistic.... 1. Arnie....an ex-commando at the beginning of the film...is living in an isolated place on a mountain - General visits by Helicopter - General gets shot....arnie says straight away Quote: I must get my machine gun from the back of the shed!!!! I mean wtf!?!@@ LOL!! Funny but stupid...LOVED that part the first time i saw the film....(i bought it on dvd...worth it for the laughs alone).2. HE'S INDESTRUCTABLE!!!!!!!! LOOL...when he is in the shopping center - using the girl to lure the bad guy to him...she tells police - Matrix runs after bad guy whilst fighting off about 10 officers with guns LOL...also...those guards at one point pile on top of him and casually...Matrix just RAWR!!!!!!!'s them off and they go flying...blah LOL  Hilarious find...those points u made Monteeeeeeeeeee made me chuckle... - Dave.  EDIT: Aaaah...i see you mentioned it Quote: 23) Shopping malls have about 100 inept security guards apiece. ....well...pretty much eh? This comment was edited by Kenwan Obiobi on Jan 24 2006 08:38pm. |
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Menaxia - Student
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I saw this movie was on in the TV guide for last night. It took me a while to remember it from just the title so i read the bit underneath, thought "O GOD NOT AGAIN!!!" and turned to BBC 1 instead... But gd1 on the learning!  It's all so true - movie magic is a wonderful thing _______________ This is not the place to look for me |
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Buzz - Student 
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"Thinks you learned" huh... _______________ When you are going through Hell, keep going. -Sir Winston Churchill. Those who seek power and control of others, no matter the level, no matter the intentions, should never be given it. |
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Ash - Eats Babies 
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"Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last?" "That's right, Matrix. You did." "I lied." [Matrix drops Sully off the cliff] "What happened to Sully?" "I let him go." [Matrix has thrown a pipe through Bennett] "Let off some steam, Bennett." "Leave anything for us?" "Just bodies." "You steal my car, you rip the seat out, you kidnap me, you ask me to help you find your daughter which I very kindly do, and then you get me involved in a shoot out where people are dying and there's blood spurting all over the place, and then I watch you rip a phone booth out of a wall, swing from the ceiling like Tarzan, and then there's a cop that's going to shoot you and I save you and they start chasing me. Are you going to tell me what's going on or what?" "No." "Mellow out man. Your daughter is safe, Colonel. Now whether she stays that way is up to you. My people, they got some business with you. And if you want your kid back, then you gotta co-operate, right?" "Wrong!" [shoots Diaz between the eyes] This movie has some of the best/worst one-liners in all of cinima history. _______________ "We keep odd hours...." ----------------------- They Live, We Sleep |
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xAnAtOs - Student |
lololol _______________ Brother to Luke Skywalker and (SKX) Dark Blade
Lag Brother to Acey Spadey 
Jools is my best friend.
<Henkes> nebody feeling like abusing me with a lightsaber?|+Smilykrazy grabs Gradius, beats the living CRAP out of him, then throws him into a huge vat of ACID |
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SaZ - Student 
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lol porsches ftw _______________ playing jk3 since 30th of january (2005), member since 1st of february. [Unofficial Master to Vision and Z�diac ] If you can make a fool of yourself infront of 300 people you can do anything - Jaiko D'kana |
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