| This is some chain letter i found the other day, it is... very amusing... | |
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Izthyen - ex-Student  |
Hello, my name is Christopher and I suffer from the guilt of not Forwarding 50 billion fricking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, a poor 6-year-old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a traveling freak show. Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000? How stupid are we? *"Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by every good looking model in the magazine!" What a load of horsecrap! Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain that was started by Peter in 5 AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower. Screw them. If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't fricking care - it really IS that simple. Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's your own unpopularity. The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it - that junks just bad fricking Karma. *If it's funny, send it on. Don't make people mad by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email. Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals. _______________ And now you ask, why was it that you fell by my doings, why is it that it had to be you... well... such is the just desserts of the wicked |
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Mreoton - Student |
Quote: Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals. Ow 0_o This comment was edited by Mreoton on Dec 18 2003 10:44pm. |
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Izthyen - Ex-Student 
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HA!!!... well i must have got the short version but that was awesome... i admit... i fell off my chair a couple times from laughing to hard.. _______________ And now you ask, why was it that you fell by my doings, why is it that it had to be you... well... such is the just desserts of the wicked |
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Jello` - Student 
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I Got something like this a few months ago from a friend. ------------------------------------------ Hello, my name is... not important. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of being kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion f*cking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, then that poor f*cking 6 year old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to the travelling freak show! Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you and everyone you send "his" email to $1000? How stupid are you? Ooooh,looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by every Playboy Bunny in the magazine! What a bunch of f*cking bullsh*t. So basically, this message is a big F*CK YOU to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards. Maybe the evil chain letter fairies will come into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by Jesus in 5 A.D. and was brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity. F*ck them! If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly f*cking amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a Nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't f*cking care. Show a little intelligence and think about what you're contributing to by sending out forwards. Chances are it's your own unpopularity. THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS: -------------------------------------- Chain Letter Type 1: (scroll down) > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Make a wish!!! > > > > > > > > > > > > Keep Scrolling > > > > > > > > > > > > No, really, go on and make one!!! > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh please, they'll never go out with > > you!!! > > > > > > > > > > > > Wish something else!!! > > > > > > > > > > > > Not that, you pervert!! > > > > > > > > > > > > STOP!!!! > > > > Wasn't that fun?  > > Hope you made a great wish > > > > Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of > > all, if you don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you > > will be raped by a mad goat and thrown off a high building into a > > pile of manure. It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like those fake > > ones, THIS one is TRUE! Really!!! Here's how it goes: > > > > *Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you > > for sending them a stupid chain letter. > > > > *Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you > > for sending them a stupid chain letter. > > > > *Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at > > you for sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot on > > your life. > > > > *Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at > > you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will napalm your > > house. > > > > Thanks!!!! > > Good Luck!!! > > > > -------------------------------------- > > > > Chain Letter Type 2: > > Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. > > You see, there is a starving little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who > > has > > no arms, no legs, no parents, and no goats. > > This little boy's life could be saved, because for every time you pass this > > on, a dollar will be donated to the Little Starving Legless Armless > > Goatless Boy from Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund. > > > > Oh, and remember, we have absolutely no way of counting the emails sent and > > this is all a complete load of bullsh*t. So go on,reach out. > > > > Send this to 5 people in the next 47 seconds. Oh, and a > > reminder -if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people, you will die > > instantly. > > > > Thanks again!! > > > > -------------------------------------------- > > > > Chain Letter Type 3: Hi there!! This chain letter has been in > > existence since 1897. This is absolutely incredible because > > there was no email then and probably not as many sad pricks with > > nothing better to do. > > So this is how it works... > > Pass this on to 15,067 people in the next 7 minutes or > > something > > horrible will happen to you like: > > > > *Bizarre Horror Story #1 > > Miranda Pinsley was walking home from school on Saturday. She > > had > > recently received this letter and ignored it. She then tripped > > in > > a crack in the sidewalk, fell into the sewer, was gushed down a > > drainpipe in a flood of poopie, and went flying out over a > > waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty, she died. This Could Happen To > > You!!! > > > > *Bizarre Horror Story #2 > > Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail > > and ignored it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his > > boyfriend (hey, some people swing that way). They both died and > > went to hell and were cursed to eat adorable kittens every day > > for eternity. This Could Happen To You Too!!! > > > > Remember, you could end up just like Pinsley and Bip. Just send > > this letter to all of your loser friends, and everything will be > > okay. > > > > ---------------------------------------------- > > > > Chain Letter Type 4: (As if you care) here is a poem that I > > wrote. > > Send it to all your friends. > > > > FRIENDS: A friend is someone who is always at your side. > > A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of > > sh*t, and your breath smells like you've been eating > > catfood. > > > > A friend is someone who likes you even though you're as > > ugly as a hat full of @$$holes. > > A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've > > soiled yourself. > > A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you > > cry about your sad, sad life. > > > > A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they > > really think you should be raped by mad goats, then thrown > > to vicious dogs. > > A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and > > then gets the check and leaves and doesn't speak much > > English...no, sorry that's the cleaning lady. > > A friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because > > he wants his wish of being rich to come true. > > > > Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll never have sex ever > > again! > > > > ------------------------------------------- > > > > The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to > > leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, > > delete it!!! If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by > > making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth, who's been > > tied to a dead elephant for 27 years, whose only savior is the 5 cents per > > letter he'll receive if you forward this mail, otherwise you'll end up like > > Miranda. Right? > > > > Now forward this to everyone that you know otherwise you'll find > > yourself forever being trapped by guilt tripping chain letters, or > > worse yet all your knickers will be missing tomorrow morning... > > > > "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I brake your fancy world?" ---------------------- I laughed so hard when I read it _______________ Brady Brothers: Orion-Greg, Furi0us-Peter, Me-Bobby. Long lost cousin to Flash. Midbie Council #007. Ex-JAK. |
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