| Academy-Watch at Nine! | |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student  |
Hint: This is in the Crazy Forum! A live report from our own Arnie Pie with Arnie in the Sky! That's right Kent! The rumors are true. The Academy has not had new members in TWO days! Is the Academy finally in trouble? These questions will be answered all, in Academy-Watch at nine! This is just in! Bail's life is still missing...  _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. This post was edited by Bail Hope of Belouve on Aug 12 2004 02:18pm. |
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Ashyr - Student 
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Yes, Gradius, that is indeed an interesting dilema. In other news, the Olympics might be cancelled due to Unforseen difficulties. Unless these problems aren't fixed soon, they will have to be relocated. Back to you... _______________ Top ten reasons to get a better computer...|My fan |
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Gradius - Ex-Student 
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Hello everybody, this is Gradius reporting to you live from the JA News studio. We have had numerous reports of Virtue walking around with no clothes on. One eyewitness was able to catch this shot of him. If you see him, do not panic. Authorities believe he is working with this person, who goes by the name of Jacen Aratan. Once again, we ask that you please do not panic. Slowly walk to the nearest payphone and call the police. This is Gradius, reporting live. _______________ - Proud padawan of Kueller. - We really are at the beginning of it all. The trick, of course, is to make sure we never find the end. - Bill Bryson, A Short History of Nearly Everything - <gen-e-sis-happy> Liek, you can train, liek, a n00b, but he'll just be a trained n00b... --> Wise words! - "daer SOE me likes your a company i am having your some money for letting me do stuff cos mes the best amd i do it all meself" - Slider This comment was edited by Gradius on May 01 2005 08:50pm. |
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Setementor - Jedi Master 
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We now go over live to tarpman who has just been promoted due to recent events involving Gradius. tarpman? |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student 
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Good afternoon lovely viewers. Today we'll be talking about the King! Today the King of a wonderful place called Carnival had his victory parade at the Not-So-White-House of NippleDom. They were celebrating their recent victory over Fred-A-Stair. The war of Dance lasted almost a good day! But it was all quickly resolved thanks to the great Bambo nr. 5! The enemy was particularly well armed, with soldiers named Teletubbies. But they're all man, in case you heard otherwise!! In our Sports Report we have our Team-1337. Here we have their lead player John Tutonopamana. And for our comic for the day: Comic Leet! _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. This comment was edited by Bail Hope of Belouve on Aug 17 2004 03:27pm. |
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Nero - Student 
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definetly _______________ -Nero Quote: Curious, Smartass, what else? |
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DJK - Student 
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lmao |
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Setementor - Jedi Master
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This just in: Gradius has just been fired from the JA News channel for lying about the fire of Bail Hope. |
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DJK - Student
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wtf bail fired?? i thought he made it.... |
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JrVicks - Student |
 ! baill fired! NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! _______________ Some say the glass is half empty, others say the glass is half full. I say, Are you ganna drink that? |
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Gradius - Ex-Student
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This just in: Bail Hope has just been fired from channel JA News. And now, reporting live from the toolshed in which he has shacked, is Bail Hope. Bail? _______________ - Proud padawan of Kueller. - We really are at the beginning of it all. The trick, of course, is to make sure we never find the end. - Bill Bryson, A Short History of Nearly Everything - <gen-e-sis-happy> Liek, you can train, liek, a n00b, but he'll just be a trained n00b... --> Wise words! - "daer SOE me likes your a company i am having your some money for letting me do stuff cos mes the best amd i do it all meself" - Slider |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student 
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and now on to our little crimson story about a detective.... and a criminal (Copyright: Ctrlaltdel-online.com) It was a cold rainy Wednesday night, just like any other, but his evening I had a lot on my mind. I was working a difficult case, and I was fresh out of leads. I tried to occupy my mind... I thought that maybe if I cleared my head, a new avenue would present itself for some exploration, but I found no answers for the question that rattled my brain. Where in the f-k is my left hand? The night was hard, but I pressed on. I needed answers, and they weren't going to show up at my doorstep. I questioned everyone, some played dumb, and some honestly had no clue what I was talking about. Like cheese spread over too much cantelope, the people I spoke with liked their shoes. I left no stone unturned, no avenue unexplored, I was like a superhero, except instead of powers, I had my questions. So... I guess I wasn't like a super hero at all... But I played the part. That's what it's all about on the streets. It became quickly obvious that I was going to need all of my super sleuth skills to solve this case. The trail had led me to an abandoned warehouse on the east side of town. Something smelled fishy, and it wasn't my socks, so I proceeded with caution. Sure enough, I came across some of the city's most infamous gangsters. Too-Much-Neck-Joey and Mickey "The Mountain" Monelli And many more. And then I got my first look at their ringleader, and my surprise was complete. My f-king left hand! That traitorous bastard! How many times had I let him scratch my ass, an honor that was usually reserved for my right hand, and this is how he repays me? I knew what had to be done... I burst through the door waving my gun, and said something really clever, like "Freeze, villanious scum!" This is why I'm good at what I do. They protested that this wasn't some secret meeting to make plans to take over the world, but a mere Tupperware party, to purchase plastic goods to keep leftovers fresh and edible. "Really?" I asked. "Yes," they replied. They asked me to join them, and as i was terribly in need of a way to preserve my hard wrought tuna casseroles, I happily agreed. I am an idiot. The end _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. This comment was edited by Bail Hope of Belouve on Aug 16 2004 12:46pm. |
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JrVicks - Student |
wow...they used to be so...tall _______________ Some say the glass is half empty, others say the glass is half full. I say, Are you ganna drink that? |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student
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Thank you tarpman for that enlightening review. We are looking forward to seeing more of your monkey in your pants. I mean your monkey in my pants. The Gentlers have won their first game in basketball. Here we see their lead man, Stephen Petrostranovich, aka Caveman shortly after the victory. In the gymnastics, it was a close victory by Petra Strablada! She is the girl on the right in that picture. She won the contest by doing five backflips and crashing into the wall, leaving a hole in the wall. Reports say she may have won by NOT sleeping with the members of the jury. Lucky bastards. And to conclude our sports section for today, we give you an exclusive view at the new Lakers team. They have all just been transferred to the team and are doing great. Give it up for ... the Lakers team! _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. |
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tarpman - The Tarped Avenger 
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Today we'll be discussing people with monkeys in their pants. Case in point: Bail Hope of Belouve. Reporting to you now from inside DJ Sith's router... which would explain the lag on the servers today. As you can see in these pictures, monkeys do not belong in pants. Why then are they there? I fought my way through a stream of qstat packets to ask masterjk3.ravensoft.com a few questions. When I reached my destination, however, I realised that I had taken a wrong turn somewhere and ended up at the Penny Arcade site. Making the best of a wrong turn, I interviewed a few idle processes on their server, and came up with the following conclusions: - DJ Sith needs to get us more servers with fast hookups. - Bail is the only person in whose pants monkeys belong. - Lesbians. 'Nuff said, eh Bail? Thanks for listening! Now, over to the sports desk. _______________ Saving the world, one kilobyte at a time. |
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Gradius - Ex-Student 
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Thank you Bail. Yes, it seems Bail has a girlfriend. We've sent hundreds of reporters out to try and get a picture of Bail's "one and only someone," and all we could come up with was this. Indeed, Bail has chosen a unique woman, one in a million. And now, on to some other guy whom we just hired for a slightly less interesting story. _______________ - Proud padawan of Kueller. - We really are at the beginning of it all. The trick, of course, is to make sure we never find the end. - Bill Bryson, A Short History of Nearly Everything - <gen-e-sis-happy> Liek, you can train, liek, a n00b, but he'll just be a trained n00b... --> Wise words! - "daer SOE me likes your a company i am having your some money for letting me do stuff cos mes the best amd i do it all meself" - Slider |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student
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Tonights topic: Fizz's retirement from the JA has left the Academy snickering and snottering and stottering and snoggeling! Still, the Great Fizzster did not want any interviews of the sort. That is okay. Because we got lesbians! Get your lesbians right here! Why buy one? Buy two, and double the fun! Now here is Gradius, discussing the wonder of Bail's girlfriend. Grad? _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. This comment was edited by Bail Hope of Belouve on Aug 15 2004 07:44pm. |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student
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LOL didn't even notice that _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. |
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Setementor - Jedi Master 
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LOL! Quote: Now on to the wordly news: Right here in New Texas we can definately see mr. SoDamn Insane hiding from our satellites. Actually, spell Sadam backwards...  This comment was edited by Setementor on Aug 15 2004 04:22pm. |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student
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Welcome to our Academy Watch at nine. I'd like to thank you all for watching (read: reading) again! Today we'll take about Lesbians! Now, who likes to TALK about lesbians? Wouldn't it be better if we ... showed you pictures?! Yeah, y'all love me baby! First, a definition: Lesbians are when two girls... erm... do ... stuff Here we have a waiting line of All lesbians! Just who's gay here? I'm gonna shove this down your throat, you *censorship*!! Lesbians... They just don't know it yet. 'nuff said Bail, nor the entire crew has anything against lesbians! Especially when they come in blonde killer bodies-packaging. And now on to our new Jazz band! They call themselves: "The Happy Bunch". This really does not show Here we have a picture of the Happy Bunch in action: Twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are, etc etc... w00t w00t! This concludes our news report for today. Let's take a look at the weather. There is some flatulence (read: wind) in America. We are still trying to find the reason, but this one might be it: Yes people, this is a real person! And that concludes our weather report for today. And remember our happy thought of the day: It takes muscles to fight and bicker, but it takes balls to play football! _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. This comment was edited by Bail Hope of Belouve on Aug 15 2004 04:04pm. |
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JamesF1 - Student 
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This is JamesF1 continuing the 'Report from Inside Bail' series of reports. Today we are inside Bail's EAR. AND OH-MY-GOSH WHAT ARE THOSE COWS DOING IN THERE. *listens* mmmmmmoooooo, mmmmommmommoooooo, 0000mmmm 000mmmm, m000000. I think you can figure that out for yourselves folks. _______________ Website |
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Tido - Student 
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lmao! |
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student
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First of all, I'd like to say thank you to Gradius, for the best laugh of the day Next, on to the news Ex-president Bill Clinton has been seen riding through town! When we asked for comment, all we got was this look. And a new ground-breaking technology has finally shown the real heritage of Bill Clinton. That is right! As everyone expected. Monkeys. The case with Monica Lewinsky clearly proved the fact, that the ex-president is actually a monkey! "I'll tell you again. I did not ... have sexual relationships with that woman" -> See, he says it himself! Monkey! Today was the great day for Al Bundy as well, since he got to meet mister Clinton in the flesh! Here is a pic of Al Bundy alongside mister Clinton. As you can clearly see, Mister Bundy is very proud of being at the side of Mr. Clinton! When our News Agency looked for pictures of Al Bundy, we found lesbians, that is correct, lesbians on page 5! Read all about it in our next issue for later this afternoon! _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. |
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Setementor - Jedi Master
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ROFL Now, we saw a game in stores not knowing what could happen. According to The Jedi Academy Representative Gradius, this has caused high amounts of wind. Heres Gradius reporting live. This comment was edited by Setementor on Aug 15 2004 11:02am. |
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SedNox - Student 
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LMAO Gradius! hahahahaha _______________ -Evil Clown- "We interrupt this program to increase dramatic tension." Echuu's 1200th comment, D@RtH N00B's 10850th comment, Redeye's 100th and 150th comment. |
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Sfire - Student 
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lmao Gradius...lol _______________ |Sfire - Padawan to MOTREC, Gradius| |Owner of Motrec's and Gradius's 999th Comments! Also Smily's 5001 comment and 3th's 1903 comment! Also, cannot forget to mention the proud owner of Gradius' 3000th comment!| |
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